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I kept asking -WHY DID I STOP?

                 W ith Taylor swift (mother) music taking hostage of my thumping brain, with the mid night rain making the chaos grow full together, I fall back to why did I stop?  Why did I stop living when situations backfired—and the rest of the days just wouldn’t cooperate? Why did I stop living when he didn't buckle up his ass to show up? why did I stop living when work turned to be manual dysfunction! Why did I stop living when homies were busy shallowing up their identities with mere wine and bread of the day. As these thoughts clouded my thumping nerves, the smoke was trying to get the work done antagonizing my anxiety and adrenaline rush, i sensed the paleness of my skin slowing turning into ashen. With my brewed coffee in one hand, tasted at set intervals, “I took a step back and watched my body scramble to put me in ‘safe mode’—like, relax, it’s gone, you’re safe now bc… thanks for the delayed update!!!   I sat down,...
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How do you/I?

How do you stand again after the fall? How do you let the reassurance come back to you? How you let yourself know, you fell , yet again! - height of fall either you touched Rock bottom or just slipped away , place , person responsible for this "kind gesture "- Nah! Doesn't matter! How about the reassurance? The pieces of your self you pick quickly, before they tend to reflect the burned but unburned you! How you assure the all First's in life are worth celebrating? How you deal with the aftermath - sweat , tears ( thankfully no blood) of all the decisions?  Decisions!?  I guess all narrows down to this !  All how's block the encouraged shines of my hormones and  all I  try to do is shake a little, dust a little, walk a little, may be live a little !                                                              ...
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